I don’t dance. Not because I have anything against it but I’m uncomfortable dancing. I was never really taught and it always seemed so intimate. If I’m honest dancing terrifies me, but I’ve always wanted to be comfortable enough to dance with my husband. We have never danced together.
A couple of years into our separation, things were at its worst. We didn’t talk or see each other. There was a song that seemed to always be playing. Casting Crowns Oh My soul, no matter where I was or what I was doing I always caught the part of the song that said, “and there will be dancing”. Those words would stop me in my tracks. I would ask what He was trying to tell me. I laughed when I thought my husband and I would dance because we never had before. But, it excited me to think that God was telling me I would dance with my husband one day.
That time brought me closer to God than I had ever been. I learned worship on a different level than I ever had. I don’t think up until that time I had actually worshipped God. In my worship I danced. I would sing to Him and sway back and forth. Hands raised. I would twirl with the thrill of spending that time with my Father. It was the most amazing and intimate time I had ever had. I didn’t hold back. I danced with my Daddy. Looking back several months later, I remembered those lyrics and knew that I had danced.
“Let them praise His name with dancing; Let them sing praises to Him with timbrel and lyre.” Psalms 149:3
This week has brought some revelation to my heart. I was thinking on those lyrics and that time. As I was talking to God about things, I hear His whisper, “you had to learn to dance with Me before you could dance with your husband.” That word brought me to tears of the beauty of it all.
I had to learn to let my walls down, do the thing that terrified me, open my heart, before I could with my husband. I had to really give my heart to my heavenly Father before I could let my husband in.
Daddies are usually the first men that hold our hearts. While my earthly one never did, my heavenly Father does. And, as most Fathers do, He has taught me to dance, to love freely, and open my heart to my husband. The teaching of it is beautiful. As I worshipped Him, He changed my heart.
I have not danced with my husband yet; but I look forward to the day that we do. My heavenly Father has prepared me to love my husband and open my heart to him and not be afraid of the intimacy.
Have you let the walls down? Does our Heavenly Father have full access to your heart and life? Have you worshipped Him no matter how silly or strange it might seem? HE has to have your whole heart before your spouse can come back. Let HIM lead you and teach you to dance. There will be dancing again. Trust HIM.
“You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,” Psalms 30:11
Praying for you today.