Many times, when a lost beloved wants to enter into the sin that is calling out to them. “Come, taste, enjoy. You deserve it!” they will have to argue with morals, upbringing, guilt, and conviction.

These are all very powerful things that are supposed to help us stay on the right path in life. Yet so many are falling off to pursue the lusts of the flesh. Why?

If the enemy could talk Eve into having a debate with him, he can talk your spouse into it as well.

“You are not happy, and have not been for a long time. It’s your spouses fault.” 

They debate back with not wanting to be the bad guy. The one that walks out of the marriage, a cheater, a dead beat parent.

But then the enemy offers solutions. Builds a huge case against you. Things you had no clue bothered them seem to be incredible offenses to them now.  All of a sudden, years of pent up offenses are now eating your spouse alive. Your loving, kind spouse has suddenly, overnight turned into a person full of hatred and bitterness.

They come at you with both guns blazing! Firing things at you from left and right. You put up your shields, bring in your own guns and fire back. You are now engaged in a showdown. No one wins!

He would leave and I would be left wondering, “God, what just happened?” God would explain, “Love him, don’t give him any NEW ammunition to be used against you.” But when my PAST mistakes were used against me as ammunition, God would sit me down and show me where I was really wrong. How it had made him feel as a man. How it suppressed his authority. He would lead me to godly sorrow and true heart understanding and repentance.

THIS was my weapon against the enemy. Not letting pride keep me from humility and repentance.

So with each past mistake that was brought to my attention. I followed God’s protocol, of humility. I would listen quietly, disarm the enemy and quiet him with, “Yes, I hear you. I understand what I did. I was wrong, I am sorry.” I did NOT defend myself. I did not try to convince him I had changed or promise I would change. I did tell him that I didn’t like the person I was and I was very willing to change and be who I knew I needed to be.  I went to God, asked forgiveness and then also confessed if my heart needed help to change. Now I was armed and ready!

“satan! I have been forgiven of that! You no longer have permission to bring this up as a weapon to be used against me. NO weapons from this shall prosper. I command you to cease in the name of JESUS!”

It worked. I’m telling you, one by one it worked. He stopped bringing up my past. Now, yes I did make new mistakes and had to do the same protocol. I had to be CONSISTENT.  But there came a time when my husband had no more ammunition against me. And guess what happened. He no longer had a guilt-free pass. He had to stop blaming me and see himself. This was a huge, huge, huge reason for him turning to God. I was no longer his scapegoat. He had to look at HIMSELF.

This is going to take TIME. Dear Standers, you can’t control or demand the healing time. It could take YEARS. 

What does laying down your life look like? We are asked to be a part of showing Jesus to our spouse. That just may look like a welcome mat in front of the door that leads to JESUS!

I am going to tell you, I was gladly willing to be a welcome mat! A humility mat to allow God room to clear me of all wrongdoing! To then hand me a deadly WEAPON to shut that enemy up. Humility is POWERFUL! Laying yourself down, laying down pride is NOT laying down self-respect. It’s overcoming and letting GOD elevate you!

Something powerful happened when I told my spouse, “I HEAR you.” Not only did I strip him of his ammunition, I replaced it with HOPE. He started to now doubt the lies of the enemy. “Maybe my wife is not the bad guy I painted her out to be. Maybe God is really changing her? “

Humility and repentance takes the prospering out of the enemies grip and gives you the right to condemn the enemy, so that ……….NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST YOU WILL PROSPER!!! 

“No weapon that is formed against you will prosper; And every tongue that accuses you in judgment you will condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, And their vindication is from Me,” declares the LORD. Isaiah 54:17 

 

Standing with you,
Sheila Hollinger