“Don’t go pain shopping. Not even the wealthiest among us can afford a single thing that a store has for sale.” Stacy

Asking them to give an account, speculating on what they may or may not be doing, asking questions you don’t want the answers to, scouring their social media, checking phone records, conversations with people that recount their deeds to you.

There are so many details and circumstances that can cloud our vision and strip our focus from the Lord. Much of it we find out without snooping or searching.

Don’t go looking for it!  You may think you want to know what they’re doing, who they’re with, where they are.

Why? You don’t need those distractions and obstructions.

It’s a fact, in this season, that they are lost and reluctant toward marriage. That’s enough information to know to pray for them.

Knowing the details and ins/outs of their reluctance isn’t going to change that. What it will do is cause you to shift your focus to “the impossible”, traumatize you, and stack up a list of offenses that you’ll have to forgive and work through.

There may come a time when it’s appropriate to discuss those things….when they’ve repented and recommitted to the marriage, but in the middle of the storm…that kind of conversation is going to “confirm” their twisted and deceived reasoning for their reluctance. And without a strong foundation in the Word and in a relationship with Him, you may just start believing that garbage.

Remember that the enemy didn’t convince Adam and Eve to commit some obvious, egregious sin…. he only planted the seed of doubt about God’s word to them.

God knows what’s happening in their lives…He knows. He’s calling us into partnership with Him and His word over their lives.

Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].Phil. 4:8 AMP

Stand Firm!
Melissa Steele



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(~Marriage Revealed Ministries Inc. is committed to helping bring healing and restoration to couples who are struggling in their marriage. We do this through the revelation of Who God is and His heart and design for marriage which never intends abuse in any form. If you suspect abuse in your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit them online at thehotline.org~

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