What is it like for someone new to Standing?
 
What are some of the things that we become introduced to, that we struggle greatly with? Letting go is one of them. Especially when we are also told to pray and fight for our marriage. So what are we supposed to be letting go of?
 
This is a really good devotion to read, then close your eyes and meditate on as you picture yourself doing what it describes and the real-life struggles you will endure as you learn how to take a back seat and let God have control of your life!
 
Let’s use the analogy of driving a car. Pretty much all of us know how to do this, or at least know what it’s supposed to look like. We are very knowledgeable when it comes to what the purpose of getting behind the wheel means. We know what the steering wheel, gas peddle, brake, shifter, mirrors are all for. It gives us the power to be in control and navigate where we are going, what way to take and how fast to get there.  Our cars and driving become second nature to us and we just do it without really thinking or trying to figure it out anymore. Being in control of our destinations becomes so ingrained in us that we don’t even realize it until that seat becomes occupied by Someone else.
 
What is Standing?
 
It’s giving God your seat, taking a backseat, and learning how to be a GOOD passenger.
 
The whole entire stand is about being a passenger that comes to trust in their driver. Rely on their driver. And become comfortable being driven around after they have spent their entire life being the one IN the driver’s seat.
 
Learning how to be ok with not having control of the route that is taken. The speed. Not having control of the temperature and what you hear.
 
For a new person, it’s learning how to get into the backseat and keep your lips zipped and not tell the driver where to go, and how fast to get you there. Not telling Him to take the shortcuts, or explain that He is taking a route you really don’t like at all.
 
It’s learning how to be a GOOD passenger, with a GOOD attitude as you are forced into a seat that you don’t want to be in.
woman in back seat
 
What happens when the car stops at unexpected places along the way. Sometimes unexpected people, like babies come aboard and, you struggle even more with why the Driver doesn’t seem to be listening to you at all. Does He not care how much His driving is affecting your life?
 
Each time you see someone else getting to drive their own car, and they try to convince you to get back in the driver’s seat, you question if you are doing the right thing. You see lots of detours, crossroads, and dark tunnels ahead, and your trust is always tested. Sometimes you are completely sitting in the dark and have no clue where you are going, hoping beyond hope that your Driver is actually taking you to the destination you asked Him to.
 
What if He isn’t? What if He is taking me to a totally different place?
 
How many times you get frustrated when you look out the window and see the SAME EXACT scenery and it’s not even moving. You have been sitting at the same exact location for years! How can you not get angry at your Driver and start putting demands on Him. “LET ME OUT. IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET THIS MOVING. LET ME OUT.”
 
You wonder if you got into the wrong car. You wonder if you made a huge mistake and that is not even God driving, right? Maybe it’s been your enemy in the driver’s seat the whole time and you have been totally taken for a ride!
 
That is what it’s like for a new Stander who is used to being in control of their life and all of sudden they have to learn how to hand the wheel to Jesus. The struggle is real. Sitting in that backseat and not being anxious. Not feeling like you need to keep your eyes on the road and brace yourself for impact because you have no confidence in the Driver. How could you? You never were forced into a situation that made you do this.
 
What does God want from you?
 
He wants to show you that He knows what He is doing and that you are SAFE with Him. That where He is taking you is best for you and not something He chose lightly. He loves you and wants what is best for you.

Standing is a journey of learning to adjust to being a backseat passenger not a backseat driver. Learning how to enjoy being the one not in control anymore. When you really think about it, there is a lot of stress that comes when we are the ones driving and a lot of peace that comes when we are able to enjoy being driven around.

For some, the struggle is real. You rebel and throw the biggest fit as you would prefer to be driving. THAT is your journey right now. Learning how to stop fighting God and let yourself be a good passenger.

Here is some real food for thought. I have seen many quit, but not for reasons you think. It was not because they grew weary of what their spouse was doing. It was because they became tired of the struggle they faced in the backseat. They gave up because they just could not obtain peace with not being in charge of their life. They quit so they could kick God out of the driver’s seat and put HIM in the passenger seat. They felt so good being back in the driver’s seat, they felt the release of the struggle and peace that comes when we take back control. Sadly this peace is a false peace that comes to mislead many when they finally no longer can handle what it takes to deny self, and pick up your cross and follow Jesus. Those who struggle with self-serving, have the most difficult time with surrendering.

Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone wishes to follow Me [as My disciple], he must deny himself [set aside selfish interests], and take up his cross [expressing a willingness to endure whatever may come] and follow Me [believing in Me, conforming to My example in living and, if need be, suffering or perhaps dying because of faith in Me]. Matthew 16:24 AMP

Standing with you, 
Sheila Hollinger

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(~Marriage Revealed Ministries Inc. is committed to helping bring healing and restoration to couples who are struggling in their marriage. We do this through the revelation of Who God is and His heart and design for marriage which never intends abuse in any form. If you suspect abuse in your relationship, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit them online at thehotline.org~