Why is God Letting them Get Away with it? Marriage Restoration

Why is God allowing them to sin and get away with it? As a Christian, you are doing everything to the best of your ability to do right, follow God, deny self, yet you seem to be falling short in being blessed by God. While your spouse is sinning and seems to be reaping a huge harvest. You are becoming extremely hurt, angry, disappointed and this is causing you to grow weary in your battle because all you seem to do is fight your own heart because you know it’s not right to feel so hurt. 

Galatians 6 is a PERFECT direction for us Standers. It also reveals that God understands what carrying the burden for someone who is lost CAN do to our hearts while we stand and pray for them. 

It begins with talking about someone who is in sin, and how we are to restore them gently AND guard our own hearts against temptations to sin. 

The Amplified Bible does a wonderful job of opening up the deeper meaning to this scripture. 

1 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any sin, you who are spiritual [that is, you who are responsive to the guidance of the Spirit] are to restore such a person in a spirit of gentleness [not with a sense of superiority or self-righteousness], keeping a watchful eye on yourself, so that you are not tempted as well. 2 Carry one another’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the requirements of the law of Christ [that is, the law of Christian love].

We know that for Standers, we must walk in this ‘gentleness’ which means: “divinely-balanced virtue that can only operate through faith.” This BALANCE can only come to us as we grow and mature in our Christian transformation, learning to yield our will, trust in the Lord, and lean not on our own understanding. This beautiful growth comes through Standing! We know acting any other way, only furthers the hardness of their hearts, prevents us from maturing in Christ, and brings much more pain and weariness to our already tough calling. 

It goes on to warn us more about the kinds of temptations we can fall into that will interfere when we are called to restore someone in gentleness. We are warned about being self-righteous and told always to examine our own hearts and motives. 

3 For if anyone thinks he is something [special] when [in fact] he is nothing [special except in his own eyes], he deceives himself. 4 But each one must carefully scrutinize his own work [examining his actions, attitudes, and behavior], and then he can have the personal satisfaction and inner joy of doing something commendable without comparing himself to another.

Now here is where God is letting us know that He really understands how hard it is for us to keep doing this, yet seeing the opposite of what we are praying and believing for. That as we KEEP pressing and doing what is right, it seems that evil is triumphing and we question if we are doing the right thing because they seem to be prospering in their sins. 

 7 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked [He will not allow Himself to be ridiculed, nor treated with contempt nor allow His precepts to be scornfully set aside]; for whatever a man sows, this and this only is what he will reap.

God tells us to not let what appears to be happening to them (prospering) deceive us. For a man that is sowing in sin, is going to REAP from that sin. 

Our deception is we fall for the trap of what a real blessing is! That material things are being reaped, but the truth is, they are reaping MORE separation and distance between them from the Lord, which brings MORE discontent and heartache to their lost souls. Without a real relationship with God, they are perishing and their spirits will mourn day and night in this and never give them true rest or peace. God WON’T be mocked! His laws are PERFECT in this. I hope you are grasping this. God is telling you NOT to fall for the lie that sin brings a person that perfect peace and happiness they lie and tell you they have. The truth is it CAN’T. God said so! 

SEE!!!!!

8 For the one who sows to his flesh [his sinful capacity, his worldliness, his disgraceful impulses] will reap from the flesh ruin and destruction, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.

God understands how hard this is for us. He knows that it’s very hard to keep being good, and it seems like our reward is more pain and devastation while they are being bad, and get all good things. 

Now the next scripture is the real point of this devotion. It’s one that we have all heard. 

 9 Let us not grow weary or become discouraged in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap, if we do not give in.

Let’s really dig in here. 

The Word for “let us not grow weary” is made from the word /kakía, which means: “inner malice”) – properly, inwardly foul, rotten (poisoned);

God is saying this. As you keep standing and doing good, as you watch your spouse keep doing BAD, and yet they seem to get blessed and prosper, while YOU, who are doing good, keep getting trampled on, don’t let your hearts become deceived to the point where you get poisoned by bitterness. 

You may not realize this kind of bitterness for what it is. It may just feel like weariness, pain, anger, frustration, and discouragement. But it’s a poison that comes from being deeply disappointed!!! You are doing right, they are doing wrong, and they seem to get away with it, and that is deeply hurting your heart towards why God is not stopping this. 

God is letting you know that their sins are giving them a harvest according to the Kingdom of God that the world doesn’t understand and deems a blessing. We are to look at their relationship with Jesus as the measurement and not the material things. 

 Please read: Is My Spouse being Blessed by God?

Our deception can come from our OWN lack of experience with a relationship with Jesus. Anyone that truly loves Jesus with their whole heart, reaps from that because that love brings opens the door to something that ONLY someone that loves God fully understands. And with that knowledge, they won’t fall for the lie that their spouse is really blessed and happy living apart from God. Only a person that is miserable in their own separation from God falls for that lie over and over. 

A life apart from God CAN’T provide a person with true inner peace and contentment. It will provide them with always seeking, always striving, always feeling this discontent and dissatisfaction. Maybe a temptation to divorce their spouse, try another relationship. And when that fails, go to another relationship or even back to their spouse and try again. Only to fail, over and over, at ever finding what their spirit and soul is crying out for. 

When YOU have found the very thing your spouse is looking for, the blinders will come off and you will understand what is missing in their lives that makes them keep buying new cars, going on fancy trips, seeking never finding. 

Remember, God won’t be mocked. His ways of sowing sinful choices will reap them a harvest that blocks their ways!

A mocker seeks wisdom and finds none, but knowledge comes easily to the discerning. Proverbs 14:6

So, how do you overcome this pain that comes from the poison of disappointments? It comes from a true understanding of what being blessed and prospering is. You have to guard yourself from the trap of deception where you fall for the lie that being separated from God is OK as long as you get what you want out of life and appear happy and content. THIS IS THE LIE that leads people to eternally perish!

Standing with you,
Sheila Hollinger